The Funeral Director’s Catch-22

Yesterday (December 30th) I had two full services with receptions and burials, today (New Years Eve) I have a full service with reception and witness cremation. I have two families I haven’t met with yet who want their services on Tuesday and Wednesday after New Years. These are the reasons my own family doesn’t see me for holidays and weekends off. As funeral directors we feel constant guilt because we feel like terrible daughters/sons, wives/husbands, parents, etc. To my family and friends, I love you and I would rather be with you on ALL the occasions and special days. But the pull of knowing that another family just experienced the worst day of their lives and that could one day happen to me is also unbearable. I will be devastated when I lose any of you. It’s the funeral director’s catch-22. I would want my funeral director to pull out all the stops I am, I would want them to be me. We, as funeral directors expect that of each other, it is our unspoken understanding. So for the meantime, please understand that I might only be able to express and show my love for you with words and gifts. I love you. I miss you dearly. And just know with every fiber of my being that this is why I so f***ing much hate the holidays.